I’d like to be thrown in the middle of a forest filled with big brown bears and nests, hope that you will consider this request. Firstly, because I could be GRUNTING instead of talking, GRUNTING suits me like a g-string. Secondly, because I could use my NAILS instead of trying to find intelligent arguments; SCRATCHING is VERY relevant. Thirdly, I rather fight for my dinner then mourning for a fUcKeR (just kidding). Fourthly, because :
a big butt FULL of fur is much more comfortable then a sofa FULL of her.
Fifthly is a really AWKWARD word to pronounce, because it irremediably makes you spit and
I rather BITE/it’s more polite/go fly a kite/I am alright.
Sexthly is a funny way to play with the word sixthly and, well, YOU KNOW, because…Animal…WILD…SEX instead of blah blah blah. Sevently, because :
I don’t want to see art historian Sventlana Arpers hanging around in Svene with her Svempas.
I rather see her svelte body CRAWLING on the Svete river’s MUDDY shores with artist Svetla Velikova.
Eighthly, because I would be PAWING instead of blogging which is similar, but PAWING is MUCH MORE relieving. Ninthly, because people would SANELY fear me (people actually fear me right now, but it’s kind of insane). Tenthly, because
I would be an esoteric bear,
sitting on a chair,
and every now and then,
I’d be rubber-necking out of my den,
looking up at the sky,
and GRUNTING out of a smile :
“rrrrowow the world is SO wonderful,
I’ve never felt so POWERFUL!”.
-Hey mommy, look at the bear, it smiles, it laughs, looks like it cares!!!
-Amazing! Just like an enlightened human being! Careful though…Don’t get too close to the thing!
-But why? It looks ADORABLE to me.
-Because wild is WILD, sweety!
JUST THROW ME OUT THERE!